Did I say "Out with the Old"?

Alright, I'm having a rough time parting with my DVDs.  There are a few boxed sets and collector's editions that I feel are close to my heart.  But the fact of the matter is, they're not.  If there was a fire, the DVDs are furthest from my mind.  Interestingly enough, I would grab my portable electronics (after ensuring the family was out safe and assuming I wasn't searching for them, I can nab them on my way out).  In my imaginary world, I grab my nook e-reader, my mp3 player and my portable hard drive.  They all happen to be in one bag by the nearest door in case of such an emergency.  Ahh, fantasy.  Now to purchase those items and make this thing happen!

Okay, back to the DVDs.  I love some of the movies.  I feel like I'm part of some of them.  As if selling them off is selling a part of my soul.  How can I do that?  Reality check.  It's not.  They are things and my life will be fine without them.  In fact, my soul will be lighter and richer.  And, honestly, I can download all those movies and keep them on that portable hard drive I so desire (which will also hold all my important information scans and pictures).  Okay, let's be honest, that's what our lives and information is leading.  To portable centers of personal information.  The hard drive is an excellent example.  And, to be honest, the nook and mp3 player could be left behind as well - I'm certain my music and books would also be stored on the hard drive.  Fine.  I would grab that one thing.

Alright, it's settled.  I'm going to suck it up and sell them off.  Lighten my load.  Free myself just a bit tonight.  And, to all who have bought me DVDs in the past.  I love you.  I loved the gifts.  I'm doing this for me and my sanity.  *kisses!*

In with the New!

Well, this was unexpected!  Geoff and I ordered this silly, plastic pink and black chess set that I think is just adorable!  And yes, I plan to keep a good, long time (or give it a new home if we somehow end up with the chess set we really want).  Tonight I will be cataloging my DVD collection for sale on craigslist.  The more things I can remove to declutter, the lighter I become.  The lighter I am, the easier it will be to pick up and travel.  The easier it is to pick up and travel, the more spontaneous I become.  Ultimately, it equals happiness.

Surround yourself with things you love.  Surround yourself with people you love.  Surround yourself with love.  It's not an easy road, I know.  It's hard and decisions sometimes have to be made.  What about the piece of nostalgia from high school or your cruise or your best friend's wedding?  If you love it and use it, keep it.  If you like it and don't use it, take a picture and maybe write a little memory to keep in your computer.  If you keep it out of what may appear to be obligation or guilt, chuck it.  You do not need anything extra lying around and causing stress by extra search time or further causes to trip or guilt.  Clutter is a stress-creator.  Declutter and be happy.

I'm going to work on this self-help part and probably create a new blog that's mostly for others.  I feel I am an excellent listening ear, advice-giver and could be a self-help guru!  Here's to wishing!

Out with the Old...

 

Tonight was a do-nothing, go-nowhere night.  Many of them has been of late.  It's nice, but it's also wearing on me.  I am feeling like I'm getting lazy...  Derby was the one thing that kept me going, going, going all week.  However, I didn't know how to balance that with my daily life and I feel I neglected the apartment and the kids to some extent.  Time for a new year and a new Cindy (aka Cynnister)!  But how do I go about this?

Step 1: Pare down.  

I canceled NetFlix.  I canceled World of Warcraft.  I am selling off my DVDs.  The first two will save money and time and the third is to reduce the amount of clutter in my home.  If you haven't read it, I love the mnmlst blog (in my links) and in particular his desire to pare down to a paltry 50 items (counting ever piece of clothing, every book, every thing).  So my quest begins to pare down to 200 items.  I will have to count every single thing I own.  This should be fairly easy, since I will be starting to pack things up to move to a new place by the end of February.  

Wow, even 200 sounds like a small amount. 

I know I can do this.  I also plan to help my boys pare their things down as well to just those items they love and want to keep.  Once we're in the new place I will help them each bring their items to 100 in each of their rooms.  I have faith that we can acheive anything we put our minds to and we can lighten our burden if we put our minds to reducing clutter.

Truly, it's better to surround yourself with fewer items that you feel are wonderful than just a mass of things that are good enough.

Nerd Fitness Challenge

Poking around my Facebook today I see a post for the Nerd Fitness 28-Day Challenge (starts today, of course, so I already feel behind...) but I sign up anyway.  I want to be an Assassin in my mind - agile, limber, running up walls and shit - but in reality I need to work on being a Scout - endurance, stamina, endurance...  My fitness goals right now consist of getting better at roller derby and making the team.  How do I do that?  Endurance.  Speed.  Power.  I'll work on the endurance portion for the time being, the speed and power will be added as I get in better shape and can handle those challenges. 

I threw up a picture Geoff took of me a couple weeks back (here) and added my stats: 5'6" and 237 lbs... ugh, not happy at all with that number, but I am the one who got me here, so I might as well fess up!  Then onto my personal challenges (we are to pick 1-2 fitness-related and 1 life-related).  These are ways to help me "level up" my life.  Remember, it's Nerd Fitness for a reason (excellent site/blog, by the way, definitely give it a read).  My goals are:

1. DIET > Make every meal at home (no eating out). I've also decided to quit soda, but that's easier for me than the eating out. I wanted to seriously challenge myself.

2. EXERCISE > Gym/Derby practice a minimum of 5 times a week. Practice runs Sun/Tue/Thu, but only twice weekly is required. Plans for the gym are in the am before work.

3. LIFE > Be to work on time every frickin' day. That's been a severe issue of mine, I'm usually walking into work when I should be starting or 5-10 min late daily. It's been such an issue that I have been written up for it. Thankfully, I have a civil service job, otherwise I'm certain I would've been fired already. This will help me become a better worker and I may just enjoy my job a bit more if I don't feel I have eyes watching me at all times.


Okay, that first goal is going to be a *killer* but I know I can do it with will power.  I'm also taking a bit of advice from the same site and finally creating my true Cynnister persona (which, I may add, will also be my derby name once I'm on the team).   I recently purchased and ran in my new Saucony sneakers as step one of my new super-outfit!  I'm looking to potentially get my name printed on some shirts or bracelet/cuff or something that will help me "wear" the new persona and remind myself to never give up and to push forward (oh, and that I truly am a bit sinister...)  Now, to figure out what my personal super power is...

So This is Christmas...

My plan... failed.  But not completely... 

I wasn't in an amazingly Christmasy mood.  Come to find out, I'm not the only one this year who feels this way.  It's been a blah Christmas for many of us.  However, I did find some missing cheer and followed it to my parents house where nothing of ill was brought up and things went smoothly and love was in the air.  Well enough at least and I'll take it, thank you very much! 

I was surprised with a Christmas card from Geoff that was so ooey-gooey that I melted.  It was really beautiful.  I was able to smile and relax and enjoy and as the night ended, quite late I might add, it felt like Christmas.  Finally.  Only for a passing moment, but there it was.  Cheer.  Love.  Good will toward man.  Et cetera.

The seasons merriment nearly escaped me.  Nearly slipped through my fingers.  The love of Geoff, my parents, my sisters and all of my family helped hold it together.  Simply wonderful.  Thank you all so much for what transpired this December twenty-fifth. May we bless each other every day with this same feeling.

Christmas Eve

Happy Holidays!  Or so I'm told...  This season I haven't felt the spirit wash over me as in seasons past.  Merry songs have been ignored, holiday tree has been topless, and greed has taken over my gift-receiving.  Why has my Merry been replaced with a Humbug?

This year has been the first in many that my boys have spent it away from me, and with their father.  I know it's nice for them and I do hope they enjoy themselves, blah blah blah... but the fact is, I miss them.  I love them waking up and opening their presents Christmas morning.  Gift after gift.  Nothing terribly big, mind you, just enough to make things fun and to give them some joy and spirit.  This year they opened their gifts before heading to their father's.  They were happy with what they got, but the spirit was certainly missing.  I'm already looking forward to making the 2011 holiday season all it can be, but why have I already given up on this Christmas before it's even begun?

For the majority of my adult life, I've hoped for the "perfect" present, which changes year to year.  Somehow I'm never satisfied unless *that* is the one I see.  Some years ago, my then husband bought me the Bourne trilogy on DVD and I was thrilled, but he had previously bought the Matrix 11-disc set and I felt it a waste of money.  Last year I received a regifted DVD player from my then boyfriend and other nice gifts as well, but the regift is what I focus on (so much that we're still friends and this is a point that has caused much hurt).  This year my boyfriend, Geoff, is being amazing.  He's already bought me new (expensive) wheels for my roller skates for derby and a $40 glass tea kettle I've been eyeballing for a couple years and there's more that I'm not certain of.  I'm honestly thrilled with his generosity and thoughtfulness.  However, I felt disappointed that I didn't receive the nook e-reader I was hoping for.  Why?  When did my gift-receiving become so greed-induced that I cannot be happy with what I'm already amazed by?  I've sucked the spirit right out of the holiday.  And it's time to get it back.

And, of course, family.  We've always gotten along well, until this past year when things with my parents began to take a turn for the worse.  No need for details, but suffice it to say it's been an uphill battle to try to make things right and leave the past where it belongs.  This brings us to these next couple days and the elephant in the room I'll have to ignore.  Now, I'm perfectly aware that I don't have to be there with the tension that may be present, but I want to be there.  Tension be damned!  My family means worlds to me, though I know I don't always show it the best I can.  So I will be there, with bells on!  Because that's what family does.


That said, this morning I got up early, lit the topless tree, sat in my comfy chair, watched Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer and painted my toes the cheeriest, Christmasiest red polish I own.  This afternoon's agenda is making Muddy Buddies and watching It's a Wonderful Life with Geoff before heading out to spend time with family.

I will be merry because I am surrounded by love and family, disregarding any friction with those I love.  I will snuggle with the most wonderful man I've had the pleasure of sharing the holidays with.  And I will finally remember what this time of year really is all about.  Giving.  Togetherness.  Family.  Love.